The state of this kitchen!

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So DH makes us a lovely chicken dinner last night. We were both doing or own things on our computers so we ate in separate rooms. When DH comes to bed he tells me that after he made dinner and ate he had to use the toilet.  So he’s in there doing his business and he hears the ogre stomping around slamming doors. Then he hears the ogre say some word (he has no idea what is was) over and over again. The ogre then says is a pissy voice “The state of this kitchen!!” Ogre did not know DH was in the bathroom next to the kitchen.  So DH calls out that he is going in there to wash the dishes up in a few minutes.  Ogre shuts up and stomps back to his “office”.  I mean the man just finished the dinner he just cooked.  Can he take five minutes before he races into the kitchen to wash dishes to take a crap? Good grief.  But when we find FIL has made a mess in the kitchen and we must clean it up…. well, that’s OK right?

Well, today I am up in the room fiddling on the computer.  The ogre was gone earlier so I cracked the door and I got so involved in what I was doing that when he returned I forgot it was cracked.  Well, he decided to just walk right in. He was pretty suprised to see me sitting there. “Oh, I didn’t know anyone was home.” Yes, by all means come in the bedroom and lurk about like you like to do when we are not home.  So that was annoying, but the creepy part is he stuck his head and half of his body around the door when talking to me and I don’t know if he was fully clothed or not.  He definitely had no shirt on.  I know… I know… I should be impressed he actually said words to me.  I guess creepy thing number two is he put on his fake pleasant voice he uses when he is around strangers. Yeah, the definitely I’ve been busted voice.  I can’t get it out of my head… his chest it was like the stay puft marshmallow man.  Excuse me while I go claw my eyes out.

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It’s baaack!

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It has been some time since I have last posted.  Two totally awesome things happened.  First, the ogre left for three days on a trip.   Then the ogre left again for 7 full days to France!! It was bliss.  Sadly DH had to work the entire week and weekend morning and evening shift so we never got to enjoy the alone time together. But, it was still bliss.  No slamming doors or grumbling.  None of that!  I moved my computer downstairs and spent my week job hunting and playing some online games.  When DH came home from work we sat in the conservatory and watched some Game of Thrones a friend had lent us.  That’s right, we could sit and watch T.V. in peace and quiet.

The ogre had to come back though.  He got back about 11pm one night just as DH and I were heading to bed.  DH had to be up for work at 6am the next morning.  What does FIL do? Repeatedly slam doors every 5-10 minutes until 4am. Did he stop at 4am? I have no idea.  That’s when I finally fell asleep from exhaustion.  I almost fell asleep on three separate occasions until the slamming sound jarred me back awake.

In the morning it was same ol’ same ol.  Go down stairs to prepare DH’s breakfast and pack his lunch and find FIL has had cereal for a late night snack. How do I know? Because the cereal is all over the counter.  So I wash his dishes (he usually stays up late, eats and leaves dirty dishes for us in the morning) and clean up the cereal.

DH comes down to eat his breakfast and I go use the bathroom downstairs. FIL has shit on the toilet seat yet again. I don’t know what’s wrong with this guy.

Then I see that FIL also had curry and managed to spill it down the walls he just had repainted a month ago.  A 4 foot stain of curry down the wall then he apparently proceeded to trample through it and smear it into the carpet.  He’s yet to clean it up and it’s been days.  DH and I have no idea how he slops stuff all over the place.  The couch in the conservatory has so many curry, mint sauce and wine stains on it.  One time the house stunk and we looked for about a week to try to find where the smell was coming from.  Well, they give a pot of chopped onions and salad along with every curry ordered.  The man had dropped the onions and salad between the cushions and never cleaned it up. It sat there in a hot room and stank up the place. Yesterday we found one of his curry take away containers tossed behind a chair… it makes me shake my head.

 

PS: The poor housekeeper is still coming around.