Curry Mess…

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I hate mornings like this – 11am and I’m sitting around waiting for my day to start. Aka waiting for the ogre to leave. I wanted to get a lot of my stuff done before it got to hot out today, as yesterday I spent a good portion of my time in the bathroom due to the heat making me sick. But, it doesn’t look that way. All he’s been doing for the last couple hours is the usual – constantly slamming the doors. 

I’ve noticed other blogs have pictures from time to time so I thought since I am a starting blogger perhaps I should put a few pictures on here. The sad thing is, even uploading the pictures was a hassle because of FIL. I am using DH’s older computer – apparently when it was new he left for a short holiday and when he came back the ogre had kicked in both of his usb ports on the side and busted them. Completely unusable now.  As everything seems to need a usb port these days I had to pull out the computer from it’s computer “den” as far as I could and blindly unplug things and plug in the camera to upload these pictures! Did he kick the usb ports in on purpose, who knows.  

I mentioned last blog that the ogre probably ordered curry and slopped it all over the place. Well he did – it is actually the most impressive stains yet.

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This is the floor next to the couch where he likes to eat his dinners at. You probably can’t see it well as I had to shrink the image a bit but there is actually rice embedded in the carpet as well and curry down the side of the couch. 

 

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This is the couch, I took a picture of only some of the curry stains he’s slopped on there.  Other stains include cucumber mint sauce and wine. The cushions are all out of whack because he won’t sit on the couch properly and he is so big that his weight ruins the cushions.

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Remember I said he had the walls repainted? Well, not long after he spilled curry down the walls then it looks like he trampled through the mess.  You cannot see it in the picture but he’s trampled the mess to a rug nearby as well.  Did he ever wipe up the mess off the wall? Nope! 

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Sprinkler Positioning

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A small thing really, but this amused me. DH and I put our laundry into the washer and go to a carboot sale yesterday. FIL saw us put the clothes in the washer so he was aware we were going to need to hang them out on the line when they were finished.   We come back about an hour later and the wash is done. We toss our clothes in the basket and get ready to hang them out on the line outside.  But what is this? FIL has his portable sprinkler out and is watering the plants in the middle of this scorching day. I vaguely remember something my mom used to tell me – and that was water plants in the morning or evening, never during a hot day or you will scorch them.  How true this is, who knows.

Regardless he had the sprinkler right by the clothes line so that if you hung something up the clothes would get wet. So ogre sees us peering out the kitchen window at him and he moves the sprinkler down about four feet and turns it a different direction so that it is only watering the pavement. Okay.. Then he makes a big show of turning it back the other way. Then he stands there with his hands on his hips staring at it maybe two to three minutes. Then he moves the sprinkler back to the original position and stares at it for a few more minutes. All the while during this probably ten minute process he tries to slyly look at us to make sure we are watching. (He does this a lot of times if we can see him out the window, he makes a big show of things, then peeks to see if we are watching) By now I just give the basket to DH and tell him to go hang them out. I leave and come back five minutes later… DH is still standing there and the ogre is still fiddling with the sprinkler.  Good Grief!

Finally ogre stomps away and we both go out to hang out laundry. The sprinkler is still in the original position and the ground where it was spraying the plants is just saturated and it’s like a pond of water. If you look down the row of bushes the man has not moved the sprinkler to any of those parts yet. He is infact drowning his plants instead of moving it to the next location. Why? This is where a normal person not dealing with a PA person would come in and say – oh this is petty he probably just wants that area watered really well. No. He wants an excuse to leave it on so that our clothes can swivel around and get wet. I hung them up anyway. I don’t care. It was so warm out yesterday they’d dry anyway.  He can’t leave the hose on all day! (Well… he could he’s done it before – left it on for days)

I’m thinking – anything else to report on the PA front? DH and I found yet another dirty curry container thrown behind the couch. After finding this the ogre ordered even more curry last night, which he let the delivery man ring the door bell again for ten minutes before answering it. I’m sure he’s spilled curry down the walls, all over the floor and couch again but I’ve not really been out of our bedroom for a day and a half so I’ve yet to see the destruction he’s left behind.

Rotting Apple

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It’s almost 2:30pm and I’m sitting up in the room eating a decaying apple.  This is my life.  DH and I keep our groceries upstairs in his bedroom because we can’t keep them downstairs in cupboards or fridges like normal human beings.  I should probably explain.

FIL I swear has some sort of eating problem/disorder.  He doesn’t cook so he either eats out, buys pre-made sandwiches while he is out or orders in takeaway.  He will at times boil a ham or make soup (which is a disgusting story in itself) to eat.  The rest of the time he eats random shit and when he eats this shit he won’t put it on a plate like a normal human being and eat it.  DH has caught him hunched over the fridge with a spoon eating out of jars and cans while quickly stuffing it in his mouth.  It’s like he is trying to hide it.  The things he loves eating for “meals” are entire jars of jam, pots of hummus, rice pudding, sugary yogurts, entire pies etc.

As an aside, the man is like 400 lbs and has to be tested monthly because he is like a .01 away from being diabetic. But he continues to eat nothing but sugary stuff, drink 2-3+ bottles of wine a day thinking that it won’t hurt him.  Part of the diabetes thing is due to his weight, he won’t exercise or cut down on food, but rather take diet pills. (which cause more disgusting issues)

So you think, well what do you care what he eats? Let him eat himself into a grave? Well, the thing is he eats our shit too!  Instead of eating an entire jar or jam he will eat 90% of it (usually within the first day or two of us purchasing) and just leave it, he won’t finish it.  As if we won’t notice it’s mysteriously lost 90% of it’s contents!! The gross thing is, he eats our stuff with a spoon, which means he is double dipping! YUCK!  We’ve made it clear to him that the stuff in the second fridge is ours, please don’t eat it. (This was after us having to throw out tons of half eaten food that he’s stolen from us) We’ve gone to hiding things and in the winter keeping food out on our windowsill to keep cold.  He still steals food!   So anything that needs to be refrigerated we really don’t buy any more except actimel. (which I need for my ulcerative colitis, so I just have to deal with him stealing some) Everything has to be kept upstairs in our bedroom.  Now that it is summer there is no keeping food outside so the only food we keep upstairs are cans etc.

So now it is 2:30 and I’ve been up since 6:00am wanting to have breakfast. But I don’t leave my room when he’s here. I am afraid he will do something.  I never want to be in a position where it’s his word vs mine because he is so delightfully charming to others and has them fooled to where I’m afraid no one would believe me!  So, I found this old rotting apple and am eating it.

Takeaway

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FIL rarely cooks, he either eats meals out of has takeaway. A couple nights ago he ordered some takeaway.  For the last six or seven times he’s ordered takeaway he will not listen for the delivery man.  Instead he will go into the conservatory which is the farthest place in the house away from the front door then close the door to the living room and watch TV.  FIL is usually in his “office” (he likes to call it that to sound important, it is really a one car garage redone) when he is home so it would make sense he remain in his “office” for the twenty minutes or so it takes the delivery boy to arrive so that he can hear the door. 

Oh no… he just won’t do that.  Instead the delivery boy has to ring the door bell until DH answers it and then goes to tell his dad that someone is at the door.  If DH is not home then the delivery guy rings the doorbell off and on for about five minutes then starts ringing the house phones until FIL answers the phone and waddles his ass to the door.  Well, the last couple times it’s been taking FIL on average 10 minutes to answer the door.

The other night FIL went into the conservatory again, DH told him that he was going upstairs to take a bath, so FIL should know that no one is going to answer the door for him.  So DH and I hop in the tub together and then after a few minutes hear the door bell ring.  We wait… no one answers… again… nothing.  DH says he’ll go answer it.  I tell him not to.  Is this mean of me? I don’t care at this point.  DH always has to answer the door! It is almost impossible for DH and I to have alone time that isn’t interrupted by something that involves his dad!!  FIL ordered the food and is going to have to pay the man so why not sit in a room where he can hear the guy when he comes?  It’s really not that hard.  I know when I order stuff I keep a listen out for the delivery person.

So DH stays in the tub.  For the next 20 minutes, I am not exaggerating – the guy rung the door bell and rang the phone off the hook.  I admit it was uncomfortable to sit and listen to.  I felt sorry for the guy.  But you know what?  If we weren’t there the guy would still be in the same situation and honestly I’m tired of small shit like this from FIL.  Honestly, sometimes I think he hears the door and phone and just ignores it.  Kinda like – he’ll get to the person whenever he feels like it.

Eventually the man went away and FIL had to eat other stuff for dinner.  Good.  For once cause and effect.  We had hoped that the place would just blacklist him, but he got takeaway the next night so maybe it was from the same place, who knows.